Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize