haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
