yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
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