Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
