I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize