ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize