So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize