That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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