What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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