called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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