Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
