You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
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