There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
Randomize
