She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toyâ€
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