I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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