whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
