I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I don't want my vagina anymore.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
