i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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