Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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