she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
where does the pee come out of this thing
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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