that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
