we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
