My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize
