why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize