Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
