Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize