end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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