His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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