is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
