Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
