U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
You're a waste of cheezeits
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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