roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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