Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Screwed.edu
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Randomize
