you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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