is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Someone shattered a urinal.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
