nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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