I wanna passion pit in your ass
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
he just fucked me for my cheese..
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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