I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
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