she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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