Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I think your dad took our porno
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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