just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Randomize
