We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
