He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
These tits shall not be calmed
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Randomize
