Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
