paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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