YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
