she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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