I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
