chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
it was like eating out sand paper
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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