We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize