So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
