Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
We talked him into tasing himself.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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