I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Randomize
